It’s been a long time since I’ve posted and I’ve been busy with work and whatever remaining of school there is. This week, I finished marking my pl1101 papers, handed over my data to my prof, handed in my final essay and today I attended my last brown bag.
This is a new era I Guess, for me. Haha the end of half study half work. School related activities have officially ended.
5 years. 5 years in nus. I wish I had taken a mandatory last exam shot or something haha. But this will have to do for now
We took this last last week when we stayed over in the grad room. It was my last week of part time work and I guess it was kind of my last time to do something stupid in school. It was also because the next day we were invited by the deans office for some luncheon so we decided to stay over.
I enjoyed staying over with them in school and as we stood on the rooftop and stargazed, I felt this sudden “omg this is it.”. This is the end of my formal education. 17 years and this is the end.
I feel privileged to be standing there that day. I’m privileged in many ways. I come from an upper-middle class family and that has helped me in my studies in many ways: I don’t need to worry about money, I can engage tutors if I ever feel the need to, i never had to work and study if I didn’t want to. I have the privilege to choose if I want to take up an opportunity or not. All these privileges played a part in getting me here today. Some people like to pretend that it doesn’t matter if you’re rich or poor, but let’s not discount how much more people who have less have to overcome. I’m not saying it was easy for me, I’m saying it was easier for me in certain aspects and I don’t want to take that for granted or ignore that.
Standing there, I also feel privileged in another way. At various stages of my life, I always try and remember to be grateful to be able to somewhat choose where I want to be. Grateful to be able to go JC, study in nus and go on and find a job and do life. Sometimes I get so caught up and I forget. I forget that there are some friends that never got to live pass 21 and never get to experience what I experience. But I hope i never take being alive and having some autonomy to choose how I want life to be for me.
But anyway, I’m even more grateful to all the people who has invested in me from kindergarten all the way till my masters. I don’t think I had the easiest time, academic-wise. There were certain points in my life, where I was so convinced I was stupid and I’ll never do well in any exam. Whenever I look back and identify a “turning point”, I always know that my turning point came in the form of a teacher who really believed in me. For that, I’ll always be grateful to him.
My life so far has so many life-giving people who, at various points in my life, carried me through when I couldn’t do so myself. This is especially so during my more formative years. Getting me here was a collective effort. I am grateful because I know not everyone has that and I’m especially thankful.
I think it was in Uni (prob y1s2) that I started getting a bit more confident. I started to find my place, started to understand myself more and started to learn to trust in God more. It was in uni, where I realise that one day I would be free.
I found amazing people. I found amazing friends. I found amazing profs. I started to be passionate in what I was studying. I finally saw the point.
I did my exchange while in uni and it was another turning point in my life. I did CDP and that was one other key milestone. I found an amazing Prof that believed in his students, was encouraging and took time to invest in them. I did my internship and found a great supervisors that believed in me too, in ways I still am not able to comprehend. I found my Husband-elect too. I got the opportunity to TA, something I always secretly wanted to try. I learnt so much in my 5 years. Took all the modules I was dying to take (there are more, but there’s no time)
There has been so many ups and downs in uni. Private sorrows and celebrations, but I grew so much in the last 5 years. Made mistakes, made good decisions, made mistakes that turned out to be good decisions. It’s time to leave this season behind me (till graduation). I want to write more in detail to help me document what the main takeaway from Uni was for me, but I think that’ll take a Long time and I want to mark this day (the end of all official duties) first.